I AM NOT MO MOWLAM. Repeat To Self 10 Times & Breathe.

PANICK OVER.

The stall was but a very short one. Things haven’t moved majorly since my last weigh in but they have moved. That’s all that matters.

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My last weigh in 28.08.17 I was at 7 stone 2.9lbs lost. As of today I’m 7 stone 4.7lbs lost. 2.2lbs in 2 weeks I not the worst thing 5 months down the line.

I’m considering upping my meal replacement shakes from 1 a day to 2 and being strict to make sure I’m not exceeding 800 calories a day.

I’m aware everyone has their own process which works well for them but I feel like I have no clue as what I should / should not be consuming calorie wise on a daily basis at this stage. Then again, I had a heavy weekend. My brain is mush.

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Is it sustainable to live off 800 calories a day? Any advice on that is more than welcome man, hook a brother up AKA tell me what to do.

ACID UPDATE. My theory of never sitting down to eat ever again in my whole entire life seem to be working.

Eat – Walk, Eat – Walk.

The minute I’m sat down post food the death pang kicks in and I need to dash out the door to power walk it off immediately but shit gets serious.

I very nearly missed a vital hair appointment last week thanks to that dreaded pang but luckily a mighty fart after a power walk brought me back to the game.

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Its vile man but you got to do what you got to do, Yas?

Speaking of that hair appointment, I booked myself for a fresh cut and colour after months of going seriously au natural. With bright ginger roots beaming through like a glow worm enough was enough.

I came away from the salon £172.00 lighter and also very sad to the core of my icy cold heart. The hair was buff, that wasn’t the issue. The issue was it for the first time it was very apparent to me how much thinner my hair has become. WEEP.

AM I MO MOWLAM? I asked myself through teary eyes.

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It’s always been my ultimate fear to have Mo Mowlam hair. Fine baby hair spare across a big bulbas head like spun sugar on Croquembouche

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You see where i’m going with this? Not the strongest of looks is it?

I have this recurring nightmare that ill wake up one morning, sit upright in bed and realise I’ve morphed into a hard boiled egg. A bald, sponge of protein filled mess.

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How to stop my mind running away with itself? No clue man, wine?

Wine always helps.

If you’re not totally sold on my wine theorem then try a before and after photo to jolt you back to reality.

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These also help A LOT.

Not as much as wine though.

 

 

 

Is Belly Gonna Get Me?

I weighed myself today and I have lost NO WEIGHT in the last 7 days.

NOT ONE FUKIN POUND.

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I had my surgery on the 21st April 2017 so that makes me 4.5 months post op. I feel this is a little early to just stop losing weight, no?

Is this ‘THE STALL’ I hear people refer to or is this just a bad week? HOW DO I KNOW?

I’ve been lax on the gym front this week thanks to 29847489384674830905058 viewings on my flat cutting into gym time but I’m PUMPED now to get back into my routine as I fear missing even only a few sessions has now collapsed my whole weight loss system and I am likely to explode into a huge ball of fat by Sunday.

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Tell me this isn’t so? Tell me this is just a bad week?

I talked myself out of cutting my excess fat off with some gardening shears this morning in the panic my slimming run was all over.

I joke, I joke. As if I own any fuckin gardening shears. I barely own a razor.

Like, what if this is it? What if by rule I was unable to lose any more weight? Would I be happy now? Would I be satisfied?

I weigh up the pros and cons

PRO – I am for the first time since birth a UK size 16 – come hit me up on Instagram to see the evidence you fuckin bbz @lillibee

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CON – My jelly belly still dominates my life

PRO – I feel less like I’m about to keel over and die

CON – My jelly belly still dominates my life

PRO – I think I’m going to live past 43 years old.

CON – My jelly belly still dominates my life

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Okay so you get le’jist?

So, I guess in a nutshell, yes, I could be happy now. I am happy now.

Of course I am highly dramatic and appreciate in reality is has only been a week but I feel it’s good to mentally prepare yourself for all eventualities, right?

2stone 12lbs is all I have left to lose to be GOAL SMASHED HAPPY. It’s so fuckin close bro.

I’m going to ramp up the efforts from now on. I was never sure I could ramp up the efforts considering how little I eat but it’s time to go all out.  PS… loving the word RAMP.

I’ve binned off all breakfast alternatives for strictly Protein Shake goodness, invested in a bulk buy from My Protein with treats such as Protein Pancakes, BCAA and Impact Diet Whey as well as a host of protein packed goody treats from Eat Natural. Which are LUSH BTW.

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Even Flearoy aka Leigh my long suffering beaut of a fiancé (of 1 year this week a thank yor) is all over getting on this ultimate health kick with me.

He blates loving our new sex life too, I reckon that is his motivation behind keeping our belly’s bound. GWARN LAD.

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